下面是对 the golden child

The golden child 反过来，潜意识担心是不是应该帮助 family 融合，自己离开家后，父母是不是能 stay together。

对 the golden child 就是反过来，don''t be the superman / supergirl，be yourself。父母的事，终归留给父母。

无他，因为这是父母生小孩养小孩的意义，lineage of the nature evolution。

Dysfunctional Family Roles

There are five to six common roles in a dysfunctional family:

1. Enabler or Caretaker: The individual may attempt to keep the family going despite the presence of addiction or other dysfunctions in the family.
2. Scapegoat or Troublemaker: Scapegoating exists in a dysfunctional family. The scapegoat or troublemaker may become sick, weak, angry, or rebellious in response to their treatment. They may receive the majority of abuse or maltreatment. 
3. Lost Child: The lost child may spend most of their time alone, avoiding the family and its dysfunctional ways. 
4. Mascot: This individual may try to alleviate tension within the family by utilizing humor or mischief in everyday life. The mascot may be labeled the family clown.
5. The Hero or Golden Child: This person may be idolized or pressured by their caregiver. They may receive less abuse or neglect but may feel pressure to excel, to please their parents, and to be “perfect.”

betterhelp.com上随手查的

对。但我简化为四种。

或者认知科学，the magic number 7, plus minus 2。

如果是四种，那大脑还有三个 L1/L2 cache 可以继续思考。否则 cache 用完就是目瞪口呆好吧。

看来我又用词错误，不应该是 scapegoat。。。我再去查查。

em·pow·er

[əmˈpou(ə)r]

VERB

1. give (someone) the authority or power to do something:
2. "nobody was empowered to sign checks on her behalf"
3. synonyms:
4. authorize · license · entitle · permit · allow · sanction · warrant ·

• make (someone) stronger and more confident, especially in controlling their life and claiming their rights:
• "movements to empower the poor"
• synonyms:
• emancipate · unyoke · unfetter · unshackle · unchain · set free · give freedom to · enfranchise

OK. 我发现我们的 dyfunctional family 心理学有严重问题。

因为少了 the blamer ～～～ the blamer 不一定就是 the narcissist。

我去改一下。

既然男女之间没有 unconditional love，为什么会有人会发明一个问题，我和你妈掉水里了你先救谁。

肯定是救母亲啊。母亲对儿子的爱可以到unconditional。老婆女友和情人都是有条件的甚至是机会主义的。

这个是对 unconditional love 的错误理解。

unconditional means entitled，而不是 unlimited.

或者说，二战时 unconditional surrender 的意思，不是说从此就只能做性奴了。