Don't guy a house now. I believe the housing market will still go down for a while. Put your money in the stock market, buy index. This will give you higher returns than 401K.

match 4% 401k.

then max your roth.

then u research your local market see whehter your local housing market is good to enter. if the answer is no, i would put more in 401k.

if you want to buy house later, use roth principle (5 years?? not sure). a few years from now, you family should have more income, so u can have 10% down or even less.