再次谢谢你的分享。
xiaoping_tao 发表于 2021-01-17 21:16
Ravish这个概念我第一次是在这本书里读到的,感觉楼主就是需要一个superior man,这个不是说比女人superior,而是在男性里,属于很知道自己是谁,purpose是谁的那种男人。
David Deida (2008). “The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire
我同意这个,我也同意男生要嘴甜,比如把班花系花校花往狠里夸。
但性学砖家要大家把心里的东施夸成西施?我觉得性学砖家们除非有本事让 neuroscientist 和 surgeon 合作来 rewire human brain,否则就是把大象装进冰箱这不是小菜一碟么?
tidewater 发表于 2021-01-17 21:47
你举证一下这个砖家的source。 谁说过这些啊?哈哈哈
我没看书,我就笑看大家的说法,折射了性学砖家们的理论。
非常能理解,亲密关系里我喜欢被lead,受不了partner被动,捅一下动一下那种,会让人很失望。
我不介意其他方面做leader,但是我女人的那一面,sub的本性,在亲密关系里没法舒展的话,我肯定也会离开。
一个两性作家david deita经常提到女性渴望被ravish,他这样定义,不知道你看了是否有共鸣:
“Ravishment is the capacity for a man to smithereen a woman, to obliterate her resistance and flow wide open to love, beyond her control, beyond her alone-capacity. Ravishment is where she is taken open to the place she has intuited as her divine nature–infinite love. To be taken open by a man who is consciousness as a practice, a man who is not trying to fuck her, who is not trying to put his dick in her to have an orgasm, who is not trying to get her to be quiet or to calm her emotions. He is completely accepting her the way she is. And then loving her so deeply she has no choice but to burst open with his full presence. Ravishment is when she has no choice. She has received your depth of consciousness so consistently, through your body, through your breath, your eyes. There are techniques for all of this, for her to receive that depth of consciousness so fully she can’t help but surrender–even if she wants to resist, she can’t. Loved, by consciousness. So ravishment is about opening a woman beyond her own fear into the love that is her true nature, deeper than she could take herself.”
xinchina 发表于 2021-01-17 21:40
这个写的太飘忽了,我是比较具象思维的人,这个好抽象,哈哈哈。
不过是那么个意思。其实好多女性心理的书里,万变不离其宗,有体会就觉得spot on,没体会就白扯。
到底了
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