这个老师不问清楚前因后果不考虑孩子性格因素随意口出恶言judge你家孩子，甚至扣上大帽子强行定性，绝对不能姑息。

这对孩子的自尊心打击强度太大了，而且事后会遭同学非议更加内向更加抬不起头。

建议对孩子进行心理疏导，直接向校长投诉，校长不能妥善处理继续上告。

这种老师真的是极不负责，居然还有guts给家长发信。这件事如果是我会严肃的要求老师retract her accusation，另一方面我会教育自己的孩子never apologize for anything that you didn't do，虽然对孩子来说不容易，但是要学会stand up for yourself，哪怕是retention也不怕，mom has your back。

For your reference:

Adding Mr/Mrs. xx (principal's name) for awareness and complete transparency.

Dear Mrs. XX (teacher's name),

Hope you are well!

Thank you for bringing this incident into my attention. I've had a conversation with XX (kid's name) and now I have a clear understanding of what happened earlier today.

First of all, he thought this was a finders keepers situation and I already made sure he understands that anything and everything he finds in the classroom need to go back to the teacher and should never leave the classroom. However, with that said, "stealing" is an accusation that I can not take lightly to which I strongly disagree in such incident; It's extremely unfair and irresponsible to make such accusation against a 9 year-old without thorough investigation of the incident.

Second, he apologized not because he admitted that he took the candy on purpose, but because he was intimidated into apologizing. I also had the conversation with him about never apologizing for something he didn't do, especially when pressured by a grownup or person of authority.

This may be a small incident, the lasting impact on a 9 year-old can be tremendously detrimental. To make things right, I suggest that you retract the accusation of "stealing" and issue an apology. If there is anything further that you'd like to clarify, I would be more than happy to meet and discuss in person at your convenience.

Best regards,

XX

肯定要去跟老师提啊，不过友情提醒一下，你这种“我们家庭经济不错，而且最近halloween，家里糖很充足，根本不需要“偷” 这种话千万别在外也这么沟通

说我孩子偷，我可忍不了！！

还递上去钱？当妈的疯了吗？