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bermangirl
遇到难题了(i have made up my mind now)
3962
50
2004-11-17 15:15:00
正在准备申请绿卡公司的律师好黑。我们自己要交8000块，我们有规定不可以用外边的律师。当然，又省钱的办法--结婚。可男朋友到现在还没有求婚。虽然我们也谈婚论嫁过，不过恋爱中的亲亲我我的话，我真的不敢全都当真。星期一我们部门经理就要整理材料给上边批了。不知道该怎么办，其实可以和男朋友讲明白问他什么时候有结婚的打算，到了现在这样，我们没有什么不可以讲明白的，不过，不想让他觉得好像是我在逼他结婚，或者是要利用他。可真的想，如果我们早晚要结婚的话，这么多钱岂不是白白浪费。 ![]()
姐妹们给我出个主意吧。
*****(****************************
谢谢大家这么都中肯的意见。看了大家的意见，加上一晚仔细考虑，我已经决定了。不要和他讲了也不让公司现在申请了。其实，结婚就是这一两年的事情，也完全是我们两个感情发展的必然。我现在不要让公司申请也不会就这样失去了以后申请的机会吧。结婚这件事情上不同一般，还是水到渠成的结果才最好。做了这个决定之后，才发现其实对他的信任和对于我们感情的信任远远超过了我预想。这样的决定，让我轻松了很多。对了，忘了和姐妹们分享，今天是我们的anniversary!
*****(****************************
谢谢大家这么都中肯的意见。看了大家的意见，加上一晚仔细考虑，我已经决定了。不要和他讲了也不让公司现在申请了。其实，结婚就是这一两年的事情，也完全是我们两个感情发展的必然。我现在不要让公司申请也不会就这样失去了以后申请的机会吧。结婚这件事情上不同一般，还是水到渠成的结果才最好。做了这个决定之后，才发现其实对他的信任和对于我们感情的信任远远超过了我预想。这样的决定，让我轻松了很多。对了，忘了和姐妹们分享，今天是我们的anniversary!
[此贴子已经被作者于2004-11-18 13:01:24编辑过]
to be honest, 8000 is not a small amount for me. I have to loan from my parents at this point. cannot afford it. of course the lawyer cannot take credit card. I just feel i have owed my parents too much. I know all of these are not good execuse for mentioning this to my bf. It is not the way how the marriage comes. To be honest, i believe it is just timing problem, we must get married sooner or later. If it is the case, I just wanna spend the money in some other way, which could be on our new house, our new car, for our kids.
[此贴子已经被作者于2004-11-17 15:33:50编辑过]
以下是引用HappyFeFe在2004-11-17 15:23:49的发言：
I would pay by myself---since you are working, it's llike one month salary,right?---be independent all the way through the marriage!
just in case something happened later between you two, no excuses for him or his family...
I would pay by myself---since you are working, it's llike one month salary,right?---be independent all the way through the marriage!
just in case something happened later between you two, no excuses for him or his family...
一个月的工资？ ![]()
真的高估了太多了。
以下是引用theOnion在2004-11-17 15:57:50的发言：
talk to your bf about the cost of $8000, see how he reacts to it.
but even if you two get married and you are eligible for applying for a green card through a different channel, you still get to pay attorney fees. it wont be very cheap either.
talk to your bf about the cost of $8000, see how he reacts to it.
but even if you two get married and you are eligible for applying for a green card through a different channel, you still get to pay attorney fees. it wont be very cheap either.
[此贴子已经被作者于2004-11-17 15:59:16编辑过]
真的，不过朋友都说不用什么律师费，只是手续费
谢谢大家这么都中肯的意见。看了大家的意见，加上一晚仔细考虑，我已经决定了。不要和他讲了也不让公司现在申请了。其实，结婚就是这一两年的事情，也完全是我们两个感情发展的必然。我现在不要让公司申请也不会就这样失去了以后申请的机会吧。结婚这件事情上不同一般，还是水到渠成的结果才最好。做了这个决定之后，才发现其实对他的信任和对于我们感情的信任远远超过了我预想。这样的决定，让我轻松了很多。对了，忘了和姐妹们分享，今天是我们的anniversary!
以下是引用ayanami在2004-11-18 14:49:23的发言：
以下是引用bermangirl在2004-11-17 15:15:51的发言：
正在准备申请绿卡公司的律师好黑。我们自己要交8000块，我们有规定不可以用外边的律师。当然，又省钱的办法--结婚。可男朋友到现在还没有求婚。虽然我们也谈婚论嫁过，不过恋爱中的亲亲我我的话，我真的不敢全都当真。星期一我们部门经理就要整理材料给上边批了。不知道该怎么办，其实可以和男朋友讲明白问他什么时候有结婚的打算，到了现在这样，我们没有什么不可以讲明白的，不过，不想让他觉得好像是我在逼他结婚，或者是要利用他。可真的想，如果我们早晚要结婚的话，这么多钱岂不是白白浪费。姐妹们给我出个主意吧。
*****(****************************
谢谢大家这么都中肯的意见。看了大家的意见，加上一晚仔细考虑，我已经决定了。不要和他讲了也不让公司现在申请了。其实，结婚就是这一两年的事情，也完全是我们两个感情发展的必然。我现在不要让公司申请也不会就这样失去了以后申请的机会吧。结婚这件事情上不同一般，还是水到渠成的结果才最好。做了这个决定之后，才发现其实对他的信任和对于我们感情的信任远远超过了我预想。这样的决定，让我轻松了很多。对了，忘了和姐妹们分享，今天是我们的anniversary!
[此贴子已经被作者于2004-11-18 13:01:24编辑过]
你们公司不sponsor的么？
律师费，手续费自理。
以下是引用snowwhiter在2004-11-18 15:08:12的发言：
sponsor document but do not pay attorny fee ba. I guess.
sponsor document but do not pay attorny fee ba. I guess.
以下是引用ayanami在2004-11-18 14:49:23的发言：
以下是引用bermangirl在2004-11-17 15:15:51的发言：
正在准备申请绿卡公司的律师好黑。我们自己要交8000块，我们有规定不可以用外边的律师。当然，又省钱的办法--结婚。可男朋友到现在还没有求婚。虽然我们也谈婚论嫁过，不过恋爱中的亲亲我我的话，我真的不敢全都当真。星期一我们部门经理就要整理材料给上边批了。不知道该怎么办，其实可以和男朋友讲明白问他什么时候有结婚的打算，到了现在这样，我们没有什么不可以讲明白的，不过，不想让他觉得好像是我在逼他结婚，或者是要利用他。可真的想，如果我们早晚要结婚的话，这么多钱岂不是白白浪费。姐妹们给我出个主意吧。
*****(****************************
谢谢大家这么都中肯的意见。看了大家的意见，加上一晚仔细考虑，我已经决定了。不要和他讲了也不让公司现在申请了。其实，结婚就是这一两年的事情，也完全是我们两个感情发展的必然。我现在不要让公司申请也不会就这样失去了以后申请的机会吧。结婚这件事情上不同一般，还是水到渠成的结果才最好。做了这个决定之后，才发现其实对他的信任和对于我们感情的信任远远超过了我预想。这样的决定，让我轻松了很多。对了，忘了和姐妹们分享，今天是我们的anniversary!
[此贴子已经被作者于2004-11-18 13:01:24编辑过]
你们公司不sponsor的么？
就是这样不近人情。
以下是引用yuanyuanlu在2004-11-18 14:54:21的发言：
I have a similar case as you. Once when he said something about international travel, I said I cannot go and I told him why.We did not talk this further but he was aware of it already. Then I started to talk about my near future and possible relocation( I always wanna move to NYC or east coast), so he got really serious about it and asked me to stay with him. Of course, I told him all my concerns at that time and he talked about his thoughts, we reached a mutual aggreement after that talk. So my suggestion is: talk frankly with your darling, with some strategies:)
Also, does he have any assets? If this is the case, then it takes much longer time for him to propose to you.
I have a similar case as you. Once when he said something about international travel, I said I cannot go and I told him why.We did not talk this further but he was aware of it already. Then I started to talk about my near future and possible relocation( I always wanna move to NYC or east coast), so he got really serious about it and asked me to stay with him. Of course, I told him all my concerns at that time and he talked about his thoughts, we reached a mutual aggreement after that talk. So my suggestion is: talk frankly with your darling, with some strategies:)
Also, does he have any assets? If this is the case, then it takes much longer time for him to propose to you.
我会讲，但不是在这个时候。定了婚之后，我会和他尽快登记，为了出入境，看望父母，方便些。
以下是引用hotwater在2004-11-18 14:38:17的发言：
怎么这么贵？俺要改行了。。。
怎么这么贵？俺要改行了。。。
我们公司用的移民律师，是个小日本儿。![]()
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